Why Letting Go of Triggers Is the First Step Toward Real Growth

I recently worked with a client who had been feeling very stressed about an upcoming project deadline at work. She mentioned beforehand that she only wanted to focus on completing her part of the project and wasn’t interested in collaborating with others beyond what was required. Her main goal was to get her tasks done and avoid any extra involvement.

After the project was completed, she expressed frustration during one of our sessions. She felt ignored by her team, particularly when they sought out feedback and collaboration from others but didn’t approach her. She was upset and began to criticize the team, feeling excluded and unappreciated.

In response, I reminded her of our earlier conversation, where she had shared that she didn’t want to be more involved than absolutely necessary. I explained that the intentions we set shape our reality, and the energy we put out comes back to us. When she heard this, she became defensive, stuck in a victim mindset, and ultimately decided not to continue working with me, which I fully respected. 

The funny thing is that if I´m feeling triggered about something, I know I need to do work on it, finding out the root cause as to why I´m feeling triggered and resolve it. Otherwise, it´s just going to keep appearing and be a constant threshold in my growth and emotional well being. This is not something that the client could see at this point and so it was indeed time to let go of the relationship. In order to change, we need to let go of what is triggering us. Otherwise, we're just going to stay triggered.  

The lesson here is about understanding the power of our intentions. If we want to create a reality that aligns with our goals, we need to take responsibility for the energy we’re projecting. Had my client recognized how her own intention of detachment played into her experience, she might have seen an opportunity to shift her approach in the future.

It’s a powerful reminder that blaming others or staying in a victim role can hold us back from real growth. When we take responsibility for our intentions and actions, we can truly start to create the life we want.

A good question to ask if we find ourselves in victim mode is what is it that I want and what part can I take responsibility for so that I can make a change. Are there part in your life that you keep bumping up against and need help breaking through that threshold? Why not reach out and let's have a chat. I guarantee you your life will be infinitely easier when you decide to let go!